HELLO!

Recently I met a woman who came to me with concerns about a family member. She wanted to know if I could help, she added her relation was an atheist. I explained I meet people everyday who are a) religious but not like me, b) religious and a lot like me, c) not religious and d) open to religious conversation but not focused on a specific type of religion. She asked me about the difference between agnostic and atheist, the former being “not sure” and the latter being “definitely not”, re: belief in a God. But the bottom line, not wanting to get lost in the details, was this, I am open to conversations with anyone who is keen to explore whatever is on their minds, in their hearts. I don’t have any specific training in these conversations other than courses taken in seminary on pastoral listening skills, basic counselling, just enough that I know more than the average person but not nearly as much as the person who hangs out a shingle and calls her/him/themselves a “counsellor”. 35 years of conversations about heavy topics is my main source of knowledge.

What I shared with this woman was this, when I meet people, I want to know their story, the story they tell themselves, the story that makes their lives make sense, to them, perhaps also to others. Often people are not aware of having a story. But they do. We all do. It’s the one part of offering a funeral for someone I never met that makes the funeral less than I wish it could be. I would love to have known their story. Hopefully, friends and family can help but knowing that story helps me understand some of the challenges others face. If we know our story, and we name our challenges, we can begin to make plans on next steps. Viktor Frankl wrote “Man’s Search of Meaning” about his experience surviving concentration camps, how many who physically walked out of these camps, never recovered, died soon after. His conclusion, we need a source of meaning to live. In my words, we need a story to tell, to live.

Bob Dylan has identified as Jewish, Agnostic, Evangelical Protestant and Roman Catholic. In this religious evolution he has had one constant, “You Gotta Serve Somebody”. Religious or not, there is a basic need to define whom/what you serve. When you wake up in the morning, what motivates you to do what you do, to say what you say, to feel what you feel? What is the story to tell yourself about you, about the world you live in, about how you make sense of how you live your life? Throughout our lives we face challenges, some more than others. And in each case, these challenges affect our story. Does the story change? If so, how does it change? And are we aware how the story has changed and what we now are called to do/be/feel? Whom do we serve now? I am here to listen.

Peace, Kevin